Players
Keith Rubin
Keith (BR '12) was the brainchild of one Dr. Ralph Findler, a crazed geneticist. Findler originally designed Keith as the perfect human, but his prodigy was disappointing. He possessed no musical talent, athletic prowess, or intellectual genius. Keith was, for all intents and purposes, a remarkable failure. In January 1990 Dr. Findler cut his losses and terminated his project to retire in academic disgrace. Two short months later, however, Findler was back. Claiming to have found the missing link to genetic perfection, Findler returned to his laboratory and quickly engineered a new Keith. This is the Keith we know today.
Brendan Ternus
Brendan (TC '12) is Russia's new Sputnik. His azimuth is 45 degrees west of Red Square. Declination anywhere.
Tom Sanchez
Tom (ES '12) was born a musical prodigy and composed many an artful and lyrical symphony. Tragically, a fire destroyed all of his original work, so he dedicated himself to meeting every day with a strange man known only as Thor the Masterful. He passed on to Tom all his improv secrets and when he could teach Tom no more Tom slayed him. Now, Tom is negotiating the rights of his life story with Paramount Pictures for the film version starring Keanu Reeves.
Jacob Paul
Jacob (SM '13) was born and raised in White Plains, New York, a suburb of New York City. He has a mother and father, one of whom he loves very much.
Zoe Greenberg
Zoe (BK '13) once convinced a guy named Adam to eat an apple in a beautiful garden. Then everything changed.
Devin Race
Devin (MC '13) has composed this haiku to express his philosophy of life:
I like to smile
It brightens everyone's day
Too bad I lack teeth.
Kat Lau
Kat (DC '13) is a California girl who's not especially fond of daisy dukes. Her great-great-grandmother was a Hawaiian witch doctor, and she hopes to one day get into the family business. If you were with her right now instead of reading this on a computer screen, she would say hello. Heck, she'll say it anyway. Hello!
Ava Kofman
Ava (TD '14) comes to the Wayne County Nursing Home with over 10 years of experience in the private sector, most recently as the manager of a high-end office furniture manufacturer in Geneva. 82,868 people like this. Be the first of your freinds. Did you mean: friends.
Amy Napleton
Amy (TC '14) doesn't even go to Yale. Oops.
Will Adams
No, Will (CC '15) is not being considered for the lead in the upcoming Carrot Top biopic, why do you ask?
Alex Lew
This is the story of Alex (BK ’15), son of Daniel. Daniel begot Alex. When Alex had lived for 563 years, the LORD said to him, “I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you; I will bless those who bless you, and curse him that curses you; And all the families of the earth shall bless themselves by you.” And Alex said unto the LORD, “Don’t you think that’s a bit much? I just want to be funny.” And the LORD reconsidered, and He said, “Okay. Then you will join the Ex!t Players.” And Alex went forth as the LORD commanded him, and the rest is history1.1Or “peanut butter” – the Hebrew is unclear.